Can we talk about how most of the last few episodes have started off on a high note with Glenn and Juliette? Can we discuss how their quasi-father/daughter relationship is a very interesting storyline that would be cool to explore especially now that we know Juliette’s daddy issues? It would be much more palatable than this current Juliette getting back in the saddle again pseudo-soul searching mission.
Anyway, elsewhere in fake Nashville, Damien barges in on Scarlett and Gunnar and he is more than excited about the baby and seems even more excited to bring the little degenerate into the world.
Deacon hasn’t picked up a guitar since Rayna died, but now he has an invite to play at the Bluebird. As Bucky packs up his office, he tells Deacon it could be therapeutic to play music again. In tears, Deacon thanks him for everything and then they do a man hug. I will volunteer to be the meat in this man hug specifically because Deacon is part of it.
Crap, Maddie is back, but at least she has Clay with her. He is helping to write a song she is struggling with, but Daphne keeps texting her. Daphne ends up calling her and tells her to turn on the radio- her song is on the air. It is, in fact, on a non-existent radio station called 88.2 FM.
Oh dear lawd, Scarlett is knitting! Is she going to knit her kid a little Scarlett hipster hippie Sherpa sweater? If this kid is anything like her mother, I hope it ONLY gets her ability to sing. Plus, its father has a British accent and mother has a horrible fake Mississippi drawl. The deck is already stacked against it. Understandably, Gunnar is miffed about Scarlett not being able to decide between him and Damien and Damien’s declaration of “we” (meaning all three of them) having the baby together.
Juliette is pissed off in general, but this time it’s because Jimmy Kimmel canceled her appearance and Glenn isn’t having any luck finding any songs for her next album. So, she wants him to call up a songwriter in town to work with her, but this songwriter guy (named Travis) must have met her because he sort of doesn’t care for her.
Because 88.2 played Maddie’s song once, it must mean she gets to go to the radio station for an interview. In my 10 plus years working in radio, that never once happened, but I guess Maddie is just a special little nugget. When the DJ’s questions focus mainly on Rayna and her death, she gets uncomfortable and Clay (who is there) is obviously rattled, too.
Deacon isn’t comfortable leaving Daphne and Liv at home alone, but does anyway so he can go play his gig at the Bluebird. Also performing there is (new to the show singer) Jesse Cain, who is obviously going to be Rayna’s replacement. After the gig, they chat and talk about the good old days and how Jesse just got out of a bad relationship. Gees, CMT, could you be any more obvious with this?
Leaving the radio station, Maddie and Clay get pulled over by the police in Maddie’s neighborhood. The cop claims he pulled them over because Clay rolled through a stop sign. Maddie and Clay both challenge it. As Clay searches for his insurance card, Maddie keeps asking the officer what stop sign they rolled through and he tells her to be quiet. Then, the cop asks Clay what he is doing in the area at that time of the evening. We all know where this is going, ya’ll. Maddie pulls out her cell phone, hits record and begins calling him out. A passerby also gets his phone out and begins filming. Clay tries to get her to cooperate and then the cop asks him to get out of the car. Maddie also gets out, still videoing, and the cop’s partner appears and they tell her to stay where she is at. When she doesn’t obey, they handcuff Clay and also cuff her.
Later, Deacon picks up Clay and Maddie from the downtown police station and no charges were filed against them. Oh, that’s not how things happen when you get locked up in the downtown jail. I know because, ya know, a friend told me. YOU DON’T KNOW ME!
Juliette goes over to Travis’s house to chat about songwriting and Travis has a hit song he wants her to pitch to Maddie. CMT, we have talked about this. Quit trying to make “Maddie is a cool character on this show” happen. It is literally never going to happen. She is unpleasant.
For those of you that forgot, Damien is a rich film director mucky muck and he takes Gunnar and Scarlett to a mansion he wants to buy in Bellevue for them to live. He keeps going on and on about how the kid is going to be a boy and how it should be named Rupert. If he is named Rupert and anything like his mother, that child will get beat up daily. By me. Kidding. Kinda. So… Gunnar begins making fun of Damien’s British-ness behind his back, which makes it funny because actor Sam Palladio, who plays Gunnar, is British. Wait a minute, why in the hell hasn’t he worked with Clare Bowen (who plays Scarlett) on her accent? He must be punished and I should be the one to discipline him. At my home. While he feeds me chocolate covered strawberries.
The video of Maddie getting arrested has made it’s way to the interwebs and is a viral sensation. Um, our President publicly said he could shoot a man in the street and still get elected while cameras rolled. You need to do better than arrested for people to care, Madds. But, in fake Nashville this is a big deal and Maddie is crying. If Daphne socked her in the face, would it make her stop? I would be so about that little turn of events.
Damien’s mansion also includes a nursery for the baby and a room for the nanny. Scrawny is a bit overwhelmed, but when Gunnar takes off to check out the backyard, she kisses Damien. I hope it’s merely to suck the good accent from his mouth.
Clay is confronted on the street by a TMZ-type cretin reporter, asking about the arrest video. Clay gets a bit harsh with telling the guy to buzz off. Then, the arrest story makes it to Access Hollywood and Zach and Deacon are trying to do damage control at Highway 65. Juliette moseys in and tells Madds to embrace the publicity- good or bad. And even though it was Juliette’s intent on stopping by the record label, she never gives Maddie Travis’s demo.
Scarlett has feelings for both Damien and Gunnar and cannot give Gunnar a straight answer about anything. Gunnar is completely tormented and should run to me for comfort. Just saying. So, Sherpa Scarlett makes her way over to Deacon’s place and breaks down crying. Deacon tells her to keep being honest with everyone including herself and “let the chips fall where they may.” Don’t bring up chips, Deacon. Scarlett won’t eat them.
Downtown on lower Broad, Clay meets with Maddie to talk about reporters camped outside his door and following him around everywhere. When is fake Nashville going to understand that kind of stuff LITERALLY never happens in real Nashville? Anyway, he basically tells her to check her white privilege because his concern when being pulled over isn’t getting arrested. His concern is not getting shot or killed. So, he does what anybody who dates Maddie should do- he dumps her. This had BETTER NOT mean he is leaving the show, CMT. Clay is one of the very few characters that make this program bearable.
Scarlett tells Damien it’s cool that he wants to be a good father, but they both know he isn’t that type of guy. Oh, CMT. What have I told you about trying to make Scarlett perceptive and astute? Anyway, when he admits her “perception” of him is correct, she turns and walks away with him calling after her. Let her go, Damien. All you have to do is imagine how insecure and mousey that kid will be along with the horrible fashion sense.
Juliette loves the song Travis gave her to pitch to Maddie. Being the typical horrible Juliette, she calls him and tells him that Maddie wasn’t interested in the song. Juliette wants to record it and put it on her new album. He tells her to go for it, but is fuzzy on when he wants to write songs with her. Get the picture, Juliette. You are literally appalling and no one likes you. As a last saving grace, Juliette even tries to send Maddie an email explaining what she did, but changes her mind.
Well, my sweet cherubs, that is it for another week. I guess I should mention this was the 100th episode of Nashville. I guess my invite for the anniversary party was lost in the mail?
So, while we wait for the next batch of blah CMT throws at us next week, take a look at the Nashville Predators’ roster and tell me if we don’t have the hottest NHL team ever? Just do it. You can thank me later.
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NASHVILLE recap: "Til I Can Make It On My Own" (Season 5 Episode 13)